Tuesday, May 22, 2012

No Fear.

I have come to the (rather shameful and embarrassing) conclusion that fear plays a large part in my art. That's not good. For some reason, my affected, crazy, creative brain has convinced me that the very next sketch I put to paper will dictate the credibility of my ENTIRE WORTH as an illustrator. Somewhere in my self-conscious mind, I feel that if the sketch I have started isn't looking right, and GOD FORBID someone looks at it, instantly my creative talent as a whole will be held in judgement. Unfortunately this results in ripped up sketches, scribbled out pages, and ultimately a very frustrated, and sometimes discouraged, artist. So I've reached what I believe is a deeply insightful conclusion.
FEAR. IS. BAD.
Who knew right?! Fear has kept me from making the mistakes that I'm supposed to be learning from. How can we climb a ladder when we refuse to step on the first rung? I've heard it mentioned that you have to let the 'bad' ideas free to give them the potential to become, inspire, or simply clear the way for the better to come along.
Now, this is SO much easier said than done. In fact, when I first attempted to create something and not worry if it was 'good' or not, I ended up balling it up and throwing it away while my mind was yelling, "no! Stop! It wasn't that bad!" So I'm forcing myself into a personal challenge, and I urge any other artists (musicians, writers, whatever!) out there to do the same. I'm going to force myself to face my fears by keeping and respecting every sketch I work on, no matter how horrendous I deem it to be. In fact I'm going to post them here even, and force myself to show them off.
Won't lie. . . it's still terrifying. But I'm hoping in forcing myself to accept my fear and face it, will help me to open myself up to 'failure' and in turn, a bigger range of experimentation within my work.
Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear. ~Ambrose Redmoon

2 comments:

  1. I'm glad you're doing it. James told me that someone said everyone has 100 bad drawings in them. So you might as well get them out. Maybe this will help. http://goo.gl/c50ew

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  2. I love this post Kat. It has my name written all over it. Thanks for sharing your experience. WE ARE NOT ALONE!

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